I went through my girlfriend’s emails and found out she had an abortion

DEAR DEIDRE: I WENT through my girlfriend’s emails and found out she had an abortion in the past, but she hasn’t mentioned it to me.

The child was with her ex, who she was with for three years. She has never said a thing about it.

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I realise it is part of her past but I feel she’s been hiding it from me.

We are both 25 and can’t meet too often because of the long distance between us.

I think this is an important part of her personal story, but she’s never said a word. Should I ask her about it?

DEIDRE SAYS: Why were you going through her emails? That was unacceptable prying, verging on controlling behaviour.

The abortion could be a painful part of her history that she’d rather forget.

The experience is part of what makes her the person you care for today and I suggest you respect her feelings about when the right time to talk about it is.

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