Bad date? The ‘anecdating’ trend says it wasn’t a waste of time
Written by Lauren Geall
As Stylist’s digital writer, Lauren Geall writes on topics including mental health, wellbeing and women’s issues. She’s also a big fan of houseplants and likes to dabble in film and TV from time-to-time. You can find her on Twitter at @laurenjanegeall.
‘Anecdating’ is the new trend designed to help daters get the most out of their time – but what on earth is it?
Meaning: anecdating is all about enjoying the process of dating, even when it doesn’t go as planned. It pays homage to all the weird and wonderful dating anecdotes that emerge when things don’t quite work out – perfect for entertaining friends down the pub.
Origin: anecdating comes from dating app Badoo’s top trend predictions for 2023, which includes terms ranging from ‘goblin-timacy’ to ‘meme teaming’.
According to the app, almost two-thirds (65%) of single people agree that even when a date doesn’t go as planned, they at least know they’ll be left with a funny or memorable experience to share. Indeed, as the definition explains: “In what is expected to be a difficult year, anecdating is all about enjoying the process of dating, because not only does it provide a distraction from daily life, it’s about the experiences that stay with you and the anecdotes you share as a result.”
So anecdating is more of a vibe than a specific behaviour? Exactly. It’s like a mindset you can adopt when it comes to dating, so that no date feels like ‘wasted’ time.
OK, but some dates are just bad vibes – so what situations can anecdating apply to? For sure – there’s no need for toxic positivity here. Anecdating is more about those dates where the person says or does something completely unexpected or things end up going wrong in a funny way – for example, you trip up in front of them when you first meet or knock their glass of red wine all over them when you’re in the middle of some deep conversation. Embarrassing? Yes. Soul-destroying? Potentially. Hilarious to tell your friends about the day after? 100%.
Those examples seem… oddly specific. No comment.
I see. But what if you’re just so cool that nothing like that ever happens to you? You definitely won’t have that problem, so there’s no need to worry – in fact, I’m sure you probably have plenty of anecdotes to tell already.
I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say that. I have one more question, though – isn’t the idea of going on lots of dates for #content just a recipe for dating burnout? It could be – I guess it just depends on how tiring you find going on lots of dates. But for people who enjoy dating and want to feel less like they’re wasting their time when things don’t work out, anecdating is a great way to adopt a more positive outlook, which could potentially make the whole experience less stressful – reducing the risk of burnout.
I guess that makes sense! So, when are we meeting up at the pub to discuss all our dating fails? I think it would be best if we keep this a strictly professional relationship.
Someone’s clearly got a lot of stories to hide…
Images: Getty/Stylist Art Team
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